Abbess,
    Christian Orthodox       
Abbot,
    Christian Orthodox        
Accountant        
Acting Official       
Adjutant General     
Admiral, Rear         
Alderman         
Archbishop, Catholic        
Archbishop,
   Christian Orthodox        
Archdeacon, Episcopal        
Archimandrite        
Architect
Archpriest        
Ambassador to the U.S.
   from a foreign country      
Ambassador of the U.S.        
American Indian Chief        
Assemblyman
   U.S., State / or           
   Assemblywoman            
Associate Justice,
   U.S. Supreme Court          
Associate Justice of a
   State Supreme Court
Attorney         
Attorney General           
Attorney, U.S.         
Australian Officials    

Baron, Baroness           
British Officials,
   Royalty, Nobility     
Brother, Catholic         
Brother,
   Christian Orthodox          
Bishop, Catholic            
Bishop,
   Christian Orthodox         
Bishop, Episcopal        
Board Member     
Boy        
Brigadier General       

Canadian Officials    
Candidate    
Captain,
   USA, USAF, USMC     
Cardinal             
Chairman
    Federal Reserve      
Chaplain in the
    Armed Services        
Chaplain of Congress          
Chargé d’Affaires         
Chief Executive Officer 
Chief Judge          
Chief Justice,
      U.S. Supreme Court 
Chief Justice, of a State
      Supreme Court             
Chief of Police          
Chief of Staff     
Chief Operating
   Officer          
Child            
City Manager    
Clergy & Religious
    Officials     
Colonel, "Honorary"
     Kentucky, or other
     state/organization      
Colonel, USA, USAF,
    or USMC     
Congressman, U.S.              
Congresswoman, U.S.   
Consul and or
   Consul General              
Commissioner, Court      
Commissioner       
Corporate Executive         
Councilman
    Councilwoman      
Counselor (Diplomat)      
Countess     
Couples     
Curator        

Dalai Lama          
Deacon         
Dean, academic            
Dean, clergy            
Deceased Persons        
Delegate, U.S., State            
Dentist             
Deputy Chief of Mission      
Deputy Marshal          
Designate, Elect,
    Pro Tempore      
Diplomats      
District Attorney           
Doctor of Dentistry           
Doctor of Medicine              
Doctor of
   Veterinary Medicine          
Doctor of Osteopathy            
Doctor, Other Disciplines     
Doctorate        
Doctorate, honorary      

Earl            
Elect, Designate
   Pro Tempore      
Eminence     
Etiquette    
Excellency           

Fiancee      
First, Second,
   Third, etc.        
First Lady, Spouse
   of the President of
   the United States 
First Lady, Member
    of Her   
    White House Staff      
First Lady, Spouse
   of a Governor
   or Lt. Gov.    
First Lieutenant   
Flag Protocol     
Former Officials    
Freeholder       

Geshe
General
    USA, USAF, USMC
Girl
Governor, Lieutenant 
Governor, Lt., Spouse   
Governor, Tribal Council          
Governor, U.S. State       
Governor, Former    
Governor
    Spouse of     
Governor's Staff,
    Member of      
Governors, Board of 

Honorable, The          
Honorary degrees    
Honourable, The       

Indian Chief         
Inspector General    
Introductions       
Invitations  
   Writing &  
   Addressing  
Invitations
    Military:
    Writing &
    Addressing

Judge, former     
Judge of US City or
        US Count     
Judge, US Federal            
Junior, Senior,
    I, II, III, etc.       
Justice, Associate
     Federal
     Supreme Court
Justice, Associate
     State
     Supreme Court

King     
Knight      

Late, The
   (deceased persons)        
Lawyer      
Lieutenant      
Lieutenant Colonel,     
   USA, USAF, USMC          
Lieutenant General,
   USA, USAF, USMC      
Lieutenant Governor         

How to Write and Address Invitations
Questions & Answers, Frequently Asked Questions, and Blog

HOW TO WRITE INVITATIONS       
How to List a Deceased Hostess on an Invitation?        
How to List a Deceased Father of the Groom on an Invitation?     

How to List the Hosts, Who Are Children of the Honorees?        
How to List Host Who is "The Honorable"?
How to Write an Invitation for an Event In Honor of Someone?
How to List Guests of Honor on an Invitation?      

How to Use Dr. or PhD on an Invitation?        
How to Use "Dr. and Dr." by PhD Parents on an Invitation?         
How to List an Honorable Groom on an Invitation?     
How to List a Judge Who Officiates on an Invitation?         
How to List a Former Official as an Honoree on an Invitation?        
How to List an Official Hostess and her Husband Co-host on an Invitation?          
Does the Spouse of an Official Get Listed as a Hostess
     On an Official Invitation if the Company is Paying for the Event?      
How to Include the Wife's Given Name On a Invitation Issued Jointly with Her Husband?           
Whose Name is First on a Royal Invitation: Bride or Groom?        
 
Can I Abbreviate Names on an Invitation?        
Can I Abbreviate Anything on an Invitation?        
Which Do I Write: 3rd, Third, or III?        
Should I Use Honor or Honour on an Invitation?       
How to Write the Year on an Invitation?     
How to Write House Numbers on an Invitation?        
How to List the Time on an Invitation?
How to Write the City on an Invitation?     

WHO GETS AN INVITATION?
Does an Adult Child Get Their Own Invitation?      

HOW TO ADDRESS INVITATIONS      
How to Address an Invitation to a Mr. & Mrs. (Name)?      
     Or Should I Use Their First Names?    
How to Include a Fiancee on an Invitation?      

How to Address an Invitation to a Bridesmaid?        
How to Address an Invitation to a Family?        
How to Address an Invitation to a Flowergirl?        
How to Address an Invitation to a Widow?         

How to Address an Envelope to TRH William and Kate?         How should I address a letter to the Their Royal Highnesses Prince William and his bride, Catherine?  I want to send a note which is jointly addressed.           From what I read there could technically be several correct joint forms, but the best one would be a matter of style:  I don't know which one would be the most preferred:             HRH The Prince William                         and HRH The Princess William             TRH The Prince and Princess William                         (but, normally the most formal form is to write a name by itself, not combined)             HRH The Prince William                         and HRH The Duchess of Cambridge             TRH The Duke and Duchess of  Cambridge                         (but, this might lower him!)         -- Royal Watcher  Dear R.W.:         Before I could figure this out, I got this reply from Chris Young, President of Protocol Diplomacy International - Protocol Officers Association, and truthfully, I could not improve on his explanation.         He writes:          I would choose                 TRH The Duke and Duchess of Cambridge.          Simple reasoning – this is the style the Palace uses with almost complete exclusivity.  It is the style on their website, on the Prince of Wales’ website, in the official diaries, in press releases and other correspondence.  If it is good enough for Buckingham Palace, then it is good enough for me.          You make a good point that a “duke” is technically lower than a “prince.”  However, this is ameliorated by the HRH style.  In British royal protocol, the HRH designation is reserved for the Royal Family – and, in specific, these three groups:         ** The sons and daughters of the Sovereign         ** The grandchildren legitimately born by male offspring.  This explains why Beatrice and Eugenie, the children of Prince Andrew, Duke of York, are princesses, but Peter and Zara Phillips, the children of Princess Anne, The Princess Royal, are not.  A modern exception to this rule is that the children of TRH The Earl and Countess of Wessex (Edward and Sophie) are not styled HRH at the choice of their parents and with consent of the Palace.         ** The children of heirs presumptive, i.e., the children of the eldest son of the Prince of Wales – in this case, any children born to Prince William. (This presents a curious situation, because, technically, any children born to Prince Harry if his father were on the throne would be styled HRH but not if his grandmother were still reigning.  The Queen, though, can rectify that by a stroke of her pen.)         Letters patent (an open document issued by a monarch or government conferring a patent or other right) issued by the Queen are often used to grant the title of prince or princess and the style of HRH.  (She used this device to create her husband, then Duke Edinburgh, as The Prince Philip in 1957.  She likewise created her aunt, Alice, as The Princess Alice in the 1970s.)  One such document contemplated your conundrum and described the use of HRH in this way:  “This [using HRH] is especially important when a prince holds another title such as duke (or a princess, the title of duchess) by which he or she would normally be addressed.  Using the style His (or Her) Royal Highness is directly associated with being a Prince of Princess of the United Kingdom.”          And we see this playing out all the time. Technically Philip is HRH The Prince Philip The Duke of Edinburgh, but he is often referred to, even formally, as HRH The Duke of Edinburgh. In Scotland, Charles is HRH The Duke of Rothesay – not the Prince of Wales.  Andrew is always HRH The Duke of York. And Edward is always HRH The Earl of Wessex.         In sum, royal peers (those who hold dukedoms or earldoms) remain princes.  However, their peerage is in addition in – never in lieu of – their princely style.          Thank you, Chris!         -- Robert Hickey Whose Name First on a Royal Wedding Invitation: Prince William's or Catherine Middleton's?       I have been engaged by our local military as a consultant for an event. They want to hold a black-tie dinner to celebrate the marriage of Prince William and Catherine Middleton. I am responsible for most of the arrangements and will provide a dining etiquette presentation to the guests. I am just putting together the invitations and have written Prince William's name before Catherine's. Would you agree? I have been in contact with the office of the private secretary to Prince William on other matters and they have been very helpful but I am to embarrassed to ask them, I should really know these things. I thought I would ask the expert!            -- Jan C. in Ontario Dear Jan C. in  Ontario:     Interesting question!     Among commoners typically the bride's name is first: The parent's of the bride invite you to the marriage of their daughter to this man, etc. But in this case his name is first since he is royalty.     See the three invitations below. All list the royal person first:         1. The recently married Crown Princess of Sweden to Daniel Westling, a commoner.         2. The Prince of Wales to Diana, who was noble ... but not royal like the H.R.H.         3. Prince William to Catherine Middleton.     FYI when I was Belgium and I read a story in Point de Vue, a magazine that focuses on nobility, about the maker of china souvenirs (mugs, plates, etc.) who had already made items with William & Cate's initials intertwined ... his "W" first .... her "C" second ... then destroyed them all.  Reason being that WC had the wrong connotation and they redid them with the "C" on top sitting in the open "W" -- deemed to be more suitable.                 -- Robert Hickey

Is The Spouse of an Official Listed On an Official Invitation?      In your book you show all the options of how to list a husband and wife as host and hostess of an event.      What if a husband is president of a company and invites his direct reports with spouses to a dinner party off site (but not at the president's house)?  Should the invitation state the president as the host and his wife as the hostess? Or just the president as the host?        -- Rhonda Dear Rhonda,      There could be a company policy in a particular company stating a policy to the contrary, but it's typical when a corporate exec hosts employees and their spouses ... and the exec's spouse assumes the duties and responsibilities of a co-host (hostess) ... for the exec's spouse to be listed on the invitation.  I asked some graduates of The Protocol School of Washington® to comment on what they do in their environment:     From Protocol Officers at Military Bases:     It would be common for social events (dinner's etc.) but not for ceremonies. On the invitation we always list both names if spouses were invited to the event. i.e.: The Commanding General, 2d Marine Division and Mrs. Smith request the pleasure of your company     From a Protocol Officer at a Museum:     If the Chairman of our Board and his wife are serving as hosts, we include the wife on the invitation to telegraph that spouses are welcome. We would do this even if the event is not in their residence.  We also include the spouse if the event is for families, again to signal that the event is open to families.     From Protocol Officers at Universities:     Yes, we include the spouse of the official on the invitation if they will act as host/hostess of the event even if the University is paying. For us, it is more a question if she (or he) is actually going to participate.     From, of course from political situations show below.         -- Robert Hickey

Should An Adult Child Get their Own Invitation?
       I received an invitation to the wedding of a first cousin's child addressed to us as The Wright Family. My daughter Jessica, now 20 and in college in Florida, was not listed by name, but is, I believe, invited.  I think a proper invitation should have been mailed to her in Florida as she is an adult and not living at home. 
    I am trying to remember the rule about all grown children over 16 should receive their own invitation at their proper address: not Mommy and Daddy's if they don't live there. I want to explain the rules to my cousins!
       -- Val Wright, Severna Park, MD

Dear Val,
    O.K. … there are a couple of parts to your question!

    HOW TO ADDRESS THE ENVELOPE?
    Everyone who is invited should be listed on the envelope for clarity. So for your family the best, in this case, a very formal example would be:
        Mr. and Mrs. William Wright
        Miss Jessica Wright
        445 St. Elmo Avenue
        Severna Park, MD 21146
    If there is an inside envelope, the invited guests are listed again:
        Mr. and Mrs. Wright
        Miss Wright
    On the inside envelope the tradition is to use the ‘conversational’ form of their name. The above form is a formal ‘conversational’ example. Certainly your cousins could write Uncle Bill, Aunt Val, and Jessica on the inside envelope if they wanted to be less formal.

    ARE ADULT CHILDREN SENT THEIR OWN INVITATIONS?
    Yes, family members living at another address are sent their own invitations.
    But, to me it's defendable to believe Jessica in college is still "a minor the nest" and your address is still her best mailing address.  So either sending Jessica her own invitation or listing Jessica by name on the invitation with you is better. 
    Whether the cut is 16 years of age ... sending an invitation to a young adult is always considerate and appreciated.
    And, whether she is Miss Wright or Ms. Wright: Either is correct. “Miss” is a more traditional (maybe old fashioned?) since every young woman older than 12 might choose to be “Ms.” nowadays.
     As for taking it upon yourself to inform your cousins of the correct rules: be careful. Dorothea Johnson, founder of The Protocol School of Washington® always followed the rule that she did not provide guidance on etiquette ... unless the person paid her to do so.
     -- Robert Hickey

How to Address a Mr. & Mrs. on an Invitation
Or How Can I Use Her First Name Too?
     I'm addressing invitations and wondering what the best way is to include the first names of both spouses.
     Which way is more correct:
               Mr. John and Mrs. Jane Doe or
               Mr. and Mrs. John and Jane Doe?
     Or is there a better way than this?
       -- Lynna

Dear Lynna,
      The forms you mention are awkward ... and I think the reason is:
            Mr. and Mrs. (His Full Name) is traditional/formal.
            (First Name) + (First Name) + (Surname) is casual/informal.
      The forms you mention are a little bit formal and a little bit casual, and end up being odd.
           -- Robert Hickey

 Dear Mr. Hickey
    I'm realize that traditionally, a formal invitation should be addressed to Mr. and Mrs. John Doe. However, I find it offensive to omit the female's name and wish to find a formal way of including it.
    This is actually a HUGE topic right now amongst women. Many are of the mindset that when etiquette becomes offensive, then its no longer proper etiquette. So, this debate has blossomed to figure out the best way to include both people's names and to perhaps give up the "don't separate a man from his name" tradition or to start putting the wife's name first even if she's not using Ms. and so forth. Consequently, people are just making up their own way to do it and there isn't continuity. However, It seems they are yearning for continuity but can't decide on the appropriate alternative.
        To be honest, I don't think either Mr. John and Mrs. Jane Doe or Mr. and Mrs. John and Jane Doe sound good. Perhaps it's just awkward because it's new? I suppose other options could be Mr. John Doe and Mrs. Jane Doe, or Mrs. Jane and Mr. John Doe.
       -- Lynna

Dear Lynna,
    Thanks for your thoughtful note.
    Etiquette is something that
        (1) changes over time
        (2) is specific to a situation, and
        (3) is specific to a group. 
    So it's not etiquette that is offensive ... it's that rules that work in one place, won't necessarily work everyplace.
    What I suggest in my book is always the most formal option -- one can be done consistently for a wide variety of guests. And yes, the forms I present may be too formal for every situation.
    The people who use my book are usually people working for high officials ... perhaps in their office .... or organizing events where the guests include some high officials ... military officers, elected officials, ambassadors, clergy, academics, and international visitors.
    In those places you need to have a single style for all the types of names you write. What works best when addressing people from many different places ends up being the most formal. The White House, The U.S. Supreme Court, and many Governors' offices use my book.
     But when my niece, Kathleen, got married she didn't follow what's in my book for everyone!  But, for certain people accustomed to formality ... she did.

    So since you asked ... why not address the invitations as you think the guest would like their name to appear when they get the envelope?
        (1) Casual for people you know would perhaps think casual will right:
               Jane and John Doe
        (2) Formal for people who will prefer the formal way:
               Mr. and Mrs. John Doe
        (3) And formal for people you don't know very well ... since when in doubt going formal is always safe. It's easier to explain being over dressed at a party than being under dressed ... so being more formal is easier to explain than being too informal.
       -- Robert

How To List Hosts, Who are the Children of the Honorees?
      I am writing to obtain your help in answering a question for my husband’s parent’s 50th Wedding Anniversary invitation.  My husband, Tom, and I will host the event. What is the proper way to list our names? His parent's names?
     The children of …
     Dick and Jeane Merrill
     Mr. and Mrs. Richard Merrill
              - Barbara Merrill


Dear Ms. Merrill:
     I am not so sure you need to identify yourselves as children. I'd list the hosts as the hosts -- and people will either know ... or will figure it out!
     Use whatever level of formality you want ... as long as you do it consistently.
     So ... to honor first

Or list the hosts first and the honorees second

     Put attire and your request for reply text at the bottom.
                     -- Robert Hickey

How to Include a Wife's Name on an Invitation?
          A physician and his wife are co-chairing a hospital event.  How do I recognize them on the invitation and signage.
          Are these the only 2 options?
                    Dr. and Mrs. John Doe
                    John and Mary Doe
          Anyway to include the wife's first name and also mention husband is a MD??
                    ~ Fluharty in Lynn, MA

Dear Fluharty:
          Most formally would be:
                    Dr. John Doe and Mrs. Doe
                    Dr. and Mrs. John Doe
          ... but if you wanted to include her name you could consider:
                    John Doe, MD, and Nancy Doe
          It is not as formal, and includes his academic post-nominal (usually used just on official correspondence sent to his office) but does allow for you to include her given name.
           -- Robert Hickey

How to Include a Fiancee on an Invitation?
       I am in a dilemma: I need to send an invitation to an gentleman and his fiancee, can you help me please?
            -- Jocelyn J

Dear Jocelyn J:
      To directly answer your question here are some options, but be sure to read the NOTE that follows, too! 
      The normal form to use on the envelope is:
            Mr. Henry Smith
            Ms. Nancy Wilson
            (Address)
      Or, if you know she uses "MISS"
            Mr. Henry Smith
            Miss Nancy Wilson
            (Address)
      NOTE:
            1) Etiquette books put an "and" between names if they are married .... no "and" if they are not.
            2) I've encountered people using 'fiancee' to describe someone with whom they are already living. If they do not live together ... it would be more correct to send each their own invitation to their individual home addresses.
            3) If the gentleman is actually the guest ... and the fiancee a date being included as a courtesy .... It would also be correct to address the invitation just to the gentleman .... and communicate you are looking forward to seeing them both at the event.  You can do this by listing them both on an inside envelope if the invitation has one ... or including a note extending the invitation to his guest.
            -- Robert Hickey

How to List an Honorable Groom on an Invitation?
       On a formal engraved wedding invitation, how do you list the groom's name on the invitation when he is a judge on the state court of appeals?
       The Honorable Micheal James Wilson or Mr. Michael James Wilson
       Many thanks..... I am going to purchase your book today!
            -- Jill in Fort Worth

Dear Jill:
      Interesting question. It's not a question I've seen answered in the wedding etiquette books. I updated the Cranes' Blue Book and even I didn't include this situation ... maybe I should have.
      He would be:
            The Honorable Michael James Wilson
      On invitations grooms DO get their honorific, rank or courtesy title:
            Lieutenant Michael James Wilson
            Dr. Michael James Wilson
            The Reverend Michael James Wilson
      -- Robert Hickey

How A Host Uses The Honorable on an Invitation?
    I am writing with a question regarding the use of the Honorable in listings of names that are included on invitations. I work in the communications office at Rensselaer Polytechnic Institute in Troy, N.Y. We hold many events on campus that often include invited guests of our President, Dr. Shirley Ann Jackson, former chairman of the Nuclear Regulatory Commission. We are responsible for creating many materials including invitations and programs-for these events.
      Our specific question is, how should we refer to Dr. Jackson on our invitations and programs, and what is the proper etiquette for listing titles for individuals who hold many degrees (both earned and honorary) and are also current or past holders of government offices and are "Honorables".  
     Example: Is it proper to say, The Honorable Shirley Ann Jackson, Ph.D., invites you to join her and the 2010 Rensselaer Polytechnic Institute Honorary Degree Recipients as they come together to discuss Re-Igniting the Innovation Economy: Science and Technology.  I had read that it is NOT proper for someone who is an Honorable to use it in an invitation. Please advise.
          -- DP

Dear DP:
    I've driven by Renssalaer many times ... so I am happy to see your note. What a fantastic institution.

USE OF THE HONORABLE WITH ACADEMIC DEGREES
    In the United States "The Honorable" is not used with scholastic degrees.  It is an honor so high it trumps academic degrees.  
     So NO to:
        The Honorable Shirley Ann Jackson, Ph.D.
    and YES to:
        The Honorable Shirley Ann Jackson

USE OF THE HONORABLE ON AN INVITATION
    On invitations the host/hostess does not identify himself/herself as "The Honorable" ... others address him/her as "The Honorable."  
    So YES to:
        Shirley Ann Jackson, President of Rensselaer Polytechnic Institute
    Or:
        Dr. Shirley Ann Jackson, President of Rensselaer Polytechnic Institute
          -- Robert Hickey

How to Write Hosts Name's on an Invitation When The
Hosts are a Governor and His Wife ... Who is a Judge?
      I am doing an invite for a luncheon and the hosts are the Governor and Judge (wife).  How do I properly list them as hosts on the invite?  Do I put Governor Dave and Judge Nancy Frendenthal or do I use The Honorable Nancy Freudenthal for the spouse?
             -- C. B. Frazier

Dear C. B. Frazier:
     One of the most frequent questions I get when I speak is "how do I address Hillary and Bill" .... so this is similar.
    1) One does not refer to oneself in writing as "The Honorable" ... others address you in that way ... so she is not "The Honorable" when she's the hostess.
    2) Very high officials .... governors, presidents, chief justices, speakers of houses .... are referred to 'by office' ... e.g. The Governor of Wyoming ... not by name.
    3) Why go so formal? An invitation is a keepsake for guests, and while they will be delighted with the host and hostess are informal in their greeting, granting the formal dignity to the office on the invitation honors the office and all of the citizens who elected the current office holder. At The White House the invitations are formal ... the conversation less formal!  It's a good model.
    So ... all that said .... depending on space you would write
           The Governor of Wyoming and Judge Nancy Freudenthal
    or    The Governor of Wyoming
            and Judge Nancy Freudenthal
    or less formally ... but it might fit on one line:
           The Governor of Wyoming and Judge Freudenthal
    or even less formally ... using his name is less formal, though not incorrect technically:
           Governor David D. Freudenthal
           and Judge Nancy Freudenthal
        -- Robert Hickey